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Monday, November 22, 2010

The Blue Benn -- Bennington, Vermont

So upon entering Bennington, we asked Maggie Gyllenhall(our GPS device) how to get to a little gem called The Blue Benn, a nice homestyle diner recommended to us by our wonderful hostess, Chelsea.  Chelsea's an adorable Japanese cartoon of a lady who is about to graduate from Bennington this Spring with a degree in Bodies Outside of this Galaxy.

Alright, so it's been brought to my attention that the term, "Slam Pig", has existed for a quite a while now, and not only has many urban definitions but has also been used as a name for a faction of some sorrostitutes from some college back in the day. So, my apologies to everyone who knew about this awesome combination of words before me, and i will now proceed to set my Give A Shit Lasers to "Don't".

Hey!  Our food's here!

Fortunately for Mr. Smith and myself, The Blue Benn had a whole page of their menu designated for vegetarians!  Mr. Smith had the eggplant almond enchilada with rice and diarrhea re-fried beans, which judging by his cleaned plate at the end of his meal, was enjoyable.  I had the veggie melt, which was a bunch of mushrooms, onions, peppers, sprouts, Vermont white cheddar, and what i believe was canned spinach, but it could also have been the type of shit they prep at the beginning of the night and let sit in a six pan.  My sandwich was a solid seven, but I'd have to say the star of tonight's dinner was the butternut squash puree:

Shit is so basic, yet SO TASTY.  Roast some butternut squash for a couple of hours(honey drizzled on top is optional), get some butter, salt, and pepper, and consider it done!  If you're feeling extra sinful, throw some heavy cream in that bitch.  Anyway, The Blue Benn definitely nailed it, and along with service which I would call comparable to hanging out with your crazy Aunt Flo, I'd say you should go ahead and check it out.

So after dinner it was time to go to one of my favorite places on the planet, Bennington College.  In my six or seven years of being a travelling musician, I've definitely placed this joint on a pedestal.  I associate it with super good times to the extreme, like partying so hard your friends have to walk around campus with a button with your face on it just to find you.  Or, I dunno, sitting at "The End of The World" while having 90's alternative sing along time with your good buds and this girl who's majoring in never having her clothes on.

But it seems times have changed, my friends.  Gone are the scenarios where your fearless touring dudes will accidentally run into raging orgy room because we were trying to avoid a conversation about a threesome with a hippo, right before we were going to have lesbian sex, and then wake up on a couch in a room where it looked like all the dudes whirled their used condoms in the air like a helicopter.

It's not too say this is a bad thing, because you know what?  We got blasted "fun for the family" style!  We built a nice cozy fire, B-rock tried out chat roulette for the first time(BR:  How are your balls?  Stranger:  Hungry;  BR:  What are you chicks up to?  Chicks:  Looking at you, ya freak."), and we even went ghost hunting!

We also played a round of B-rock's favorite game, Hide the Banana:

And this happened, too!

*Sigh* Good times!  Come to think of, I'm pretty sure it was exam/term paper time, so maybe next time we're there it will be back to the good ol' days of the 60's version of "The Wicker Man", but if not, Bennington still rules.

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